I smoke my candy cigarette
No more shall I fret
My craving has been answered
Why am I talking to a bird?
You don't listen to me, fuzz
But, my candy surely does
I don't know if you know
But, if you do, you should show
Maybe you aren't an freak
But, why do you have beak?
Wait, that's right, you're a bird
Are listening to these words?

I want another candy cigarette
It's the only thing
It's the reason that I get up
It's the reason that I sing
I want another cigarette
Please come back to me
Come back candy cigarette
My cigarette of candy

Minutes after my previous
I start to become devious
Thinking of stealing another one
That could be some fun
I don't understand why I love you like I do
You are a candy cigarette come from Katmandu
Please don't ever leave me
Let's never depart
Candy cigarette, I love you with all my heart
I can't kick this habit
I'd even kill a rabbit
I hate this addiction, but I love to fulfill it
I wish it'd go away but it won't now will it?

I want another candy cigarette
It's the only thing
It's the reason that I get up
It's the reason that I sing
I want another cigarette
Oh great here's Mr. T
Don't leave me here with him
To be the target of his pity

The box is now empty, what have I done?
I'd buy more, but money I have none
Cravings got the best of me, what shall I do?
Perhaps I could sit on my toilet and poo
That's the only answer for my prayers
Why am I getting these awkward stares
More candy is what I want
Please do not front
Don't you understand that I'm a man with a disease?
You can do anything, but so candy you should bring, if you please

I want another candy cigarette
It's the only thing
It's the reason that I get up
It's the reason that I sing
I want another cigarette
Oh, please come back to me
Come on magic cigarette
oohhohhohhhh